Experience for the Young

Having spent the last three weeks in London (I can't believe it's already been that long!) I've gotten to know my home-stay "mom", Ellen, quite well. Many evenings have been spend sharing tea and cookies, and talking about our pasts, presents and futures. When asked to interview an older member of the British community I knew I wanted to talk to her about her life experiences. She was very willing to answer my questions, provided I paid her with some of the home-made fudge I received from home, so with tea and chocolate in tow we headed towards the living room.

Although I've heard many stories of her childhood experiences over the last few weeks, I started out by asking her what kinds of things she did with her family as a child. They had no TV when she was young, so they would often gather around the radio to listen to their favorite ghostly radio show called Appointment With Fear. Every Sunday afternoon was spent playing board games, picnicking in the park, and sometimes going for a swim or seeing a film at the local cinema. As she's told me before, she had a very happy childhood with an extremely close-knit family. Her mother used to say that the dining room table was the most important piece of furniture in the house. It was where the family came together to share the experiences of their day and enjoy time together. She always has valued family above all else, and she talked in great detail about how she's worked hard to pass that along to her children and grandchildren. Times are changing, though, and she knows it.

I asked Ellen about the important social changes that have taken place over the years and how they've affected the culture. Her first response was that kids spend too much time in front of the TV and computer these days. Too much of life is planned out, with set times for everything. Family life is becoming more and more scattered. Besides family, she said that neighbors aren't friendly to each other like they used to be. She doesn't even know some of the families that live around her. Ellen feels that the importance of family and community isn't shared by many English people anymore. The culture is becoming more and more of a "keeping up with the Jones'" mentality, rather than the more laid back, content with what they had attitude of the past. She told me several times that kids today just have too much stuff, and I wholeheartedly agree.

When I was a child, which wasn't all that long ago, I remember that our favorite Saturday night activity was to put the microwave in the middle of the kitchen counter, insert a bag of popcorn, turn off all the lights in the house and watch it slowly rotate as it popped. Simple things like that were all it took to entertain my brother and I and bring laughter into our household. Now, only a decade or so later, I notice the changes. I regularly babysit two young children, and it takes an entire room full of stuffed animals, Star Wars action figures, books, Legos, foam swords and dress-up costumes to get them through the six hours that I care for them. Although I think my family did a very good job of not letting our focus be on things rather than people, I feel that America has always been very material-minded. In my opinion, technological changes in the US have done the most damage. The kid who had the Game Boy was not as cool as the kid who had the Game Boy Color. It's a steady progression, and it's not exactly doing wonders for the family unit. I can definitely feel a separation in my own family now that TV shows and X-Box games rule our evenings, rather than the ghost stories and board games we used to share.

Ellen gave me an important piece of advice. She stressed the importance of keeping a family close together, and passing along that mindset to the younger generations. Although it's a lesson I was taught growing up, it adds a lot of value when an older member of society acknowledges it. Although I'm not anywhere close to starting my own family, I'll definitely do my very best to model closeness, sharing experiences, and holding on to the ones I love, despite what our culture beckons.